May-Day

Ohmigoodness! Has it really been three weeks since I wrote anything down here? Golly! Well, it's been an eventful three weeks, which I could never hope to explain fully, but just to keep you updated:

A little less than two weeks ago, I had - (too much information ahead) - some serious bleeding. Not just spotting, which I wouldn't worry about, but flat out, crazy bleeding. I had an appointment that afternoon, so I called them and said, I gotta come in RIGHT NOW. They agreed. So my boss took me, which was a blessing, even though I said I didn't need any help. It gave me time to get my mind and heart right. So even through the blind panic I was experiencing, I was able to find peace in the fact that everything was in God's hands. That was what I had talked to Jonathan about the MORNING we found out we were pregnant. I made him PROMISE that he wouldn't be devastated if we lost this baby. Natural grief is handle-able, but he's wanted a baby since I've MET him, and I'm not sure he's fully able to trust God with the life of this little one. Why not? It's so far out of our hands that it doesn't make any sense not to!

Anyway, after that huge buildup! The baby was FINE. Before the doc had a chance to do anything more than an ultrasound, she got called away on an emergency c-section, so didn't tell me what to do or whether I should worry! So that night, when I started cramping so badly I wanted to pass out, and when I was still bleeding just as heavily the next day, I went BACK. Still nothing to worry about - and Jonathan got to see Jellybean move! - but they couldn't tell me what was up. So I was nervous for a couple of days until everyone I know has found at least one person who had gone through the same thing and was perfectly healthy!

(Thanks to MLE for letting me copy out of her e-mail for this journal! Saved me some time!)

So even though it was crazy for a while, things continue to go really well for us. I'm down to one nausea pill a day - but if I wait too long to take it, I get my bottom kicked. I'm still really tired most of the time, but I'm just about past the first trimester, yes? So that should be ending soon.

Evelyn Perez-Jones' baby girl had HER baby girl this past week - it made me really excited and terrified to give birth. Excited, because it happened so swiftly, and scared because I had forgotten how disgusting childbirth is. I better start getting used to it, huh? I'll have to watch those gross birth videos when I take the classes at the hospital. Blech!

I'm starting to make a list of the baby stuff we'll need - I've come up with a crib and a baby gate. If anyone can think of anything else, I'd appreciate your input. I know I'll be able to find a crib at a garage sale or something, but I think we'll buy a new baby gate, because I think they keep coming out with better ones. OH! And a car seat and stroller. I forgot about that. Can't live without them! (I've put my dream of a moped on hold for a while, since it isn't terribly wise of me to strap a baby seat to the back...)